Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Weekly Update

Okay, so it's a little more than a week since I last posted. What are you going to do about it, tough guy?

Work: I am still ultra-busy and on the road non-stop. I am blogging today from San Francisco. It is beautifully sunny out, but cold in comparison to Southern California. I had lunch and a nice walk upon arrival and am now in my hotel room, dutifully working (and Yelping and blogging.) Tomorrow and Friday I am in Palm Springs. Lest you think life is easy, I DROVE to Fresno and back on Monday. Fresno is actually pleasant enough, but everything between the Grapevine and there is Bumfuck, California.

Personal life: I am beginning to remember what it was like to really be single and wondering if I am equipped for this. Not the primping and preening (and the shaving and the waxing) but just all the time and attention I have to expend on other people. I have so many digits in my celly right now, they be callin' me The Phonebook. I get texts and IMs and emails all is quite ridiculous. Also difficult to remember the names of all the guys I am dating. I just call them all "baby." I am only halfway kidding. Okay, quarter-way kidding.

City Elf-speak: My new favorite phrase is "That's for bitches." Anything I don't like is for bitches. Love? For bitches. Doing laundry? Also for bitches. Conference calls are definitely for bitches. As is driving less than 85 mph in the fast lane.

Yelp: How quickly I have become addicted! I come home, I yelp. When I am bored on the road (or in a meeting - shhh), I read Yelp from my Blackberry, which is true commitment, because that shit is slow as molasses on a handheld. If I'm going out to eat, I consider: have I already been here and yelped this place? If so, shouldn't I try something new? Yelp - it's the new crack.

Some selected quotes from this past week's posts:

On Ceviche del Rey...
I've been searching for a Peruvian boyfriend ever since we went there so he can cook me his native food while he wears a loincloth and I drink beer and watch TV. (I may have a slightly skewed vision of how people in other countries live.)

On Verizon Wireless Ampitheatre...
When we made it to the actual venue portion, we faced a long, uphill climb. It's like the Greek, if you stacked three Greeks one on top of the other. (Mmmmm...stacked Greeks. Pause for obligatory dirty 300 fantasy.)

On Fish Grill...
The soda machine was having some digestive issues and alternately refusing to dispense ice and barfing it up like a sorority girl at a kegger.

Miscellaneous: Aside from that, the big news is that I went a whole four days without a drink. My goal was to go a whole week, but my intern Sarah pointed out that from Monday to Friday is a work week, and I should really just go ahead and have a beer. Or four. Which is why I came home from the airport last week completely smashed and passed out fully dressed, resulting in my waking up in the morning wondering why all the lights in the house were on and why I was so goddamn thirsty. But you know,'s for bitches.

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