Better Living Through Dentistry
So I finally gave in and got a night guard.
Not the one that my dentist wanted to custom mold for the low, low price of SEVEN HUNDRED DOLLARS (!!!), but rather the one I found at Target for $19.99 that looks like this:
Look, a malleable plastic hocky puck! Just boil and bite to prevent the nighttime grinding* that will wear your teeth to nubs and cause unbearable headaches.
In good news, it's making me sleep better, despite feeling like I'm wearing orthodontic headgear again.**
In bad news, I'm probably absorbing phthalates or bisphenol-A and as a result will have early on-set Alzheimer’s. Also I can't imagine wearing it to bed with someone beside me.
* Mmm, nighttime grinding...
** Yes, I wore headgear. It was humiliating.
4 comments:
Headgear is HOT!
pobrecita... for what its worth, i have no recollection of you in headgear. but many other, equally humiliating ones i could share if you like :)
hey...there's a special someone who would dig a mouth guard. ya know...someone into field hockey/wrestler/lacrosse look...
just say it's a role play toy!
anna, i thought we agreed to keep your humiliating recollections about me just between us! renee, i think i found my special someone and apparently it's jenny. ;)
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